nothing left to lose

i love that song :)
anyway today was a gd but tiring day.

ystdy was the last U-turn (the kids ministry)..kinda bittersweet. not gonna see them for the whole summer! will kinda miss them. they're adorable but cheeky kids. cuz we were playing water bombs..it was mad chaos. imagine kids high on sugar from ice cream n cake..exposed to 3 boxes full of water bombs. heh. dangerous!

anw stayed up till like 4+am..so today was zombified. haha. had a 'sleepover' with some girls from my jamaica trip..only we didn't sleep over. we just went back to our rooms when we got tired. haha. i love those girls. so glad we're still hanging out. it was a common thought/worry that we would not see each other after jamaica, but..we've been doing stuff together..which is fun :) hung out n talked late into the night in lauren's room. then made a late night run to taco bell cuz we got hungry. got josh some food too. cuz this week is Social Justice Week at Taylor..so some pple are camping outside (in the freezing cold) with only cardboard boxes and one bland meal a day and 3 other things they can bring with them. don't really know the purpose of this cuz it's not like they're doing this in front of the government or something to protest. they're just doing it for awareness..which is..kinda weird. cuz awareness will not help the homeless unless u do something about their plight. so anw he was awfully thankful for our social services provision. haha.

got like 3 hrs of sleep then had to get up for my first meeting with the rest of the TWO (taylor world outreach) cabinet! cuz TCA co-director's part of TWO. so met other co-directors of other ministries, which was cool. was kinda like the current directors handing down the position to us..and they prayed for us n all. and i met the guy i'm gonna be working with next yr for TCA..turns out he's in one of my classes! haha. he's pretty cool. a freshman too..from albania. so he didn't grow up in the States. like me! and he plays the piano, guit and drums..like me!!! awesomeness. i think we'll get along :)

i fell asleep in most classes and skipped one cuz i was just so tired. but my fav class today was christian education :) cuz my prof kinda 'interviewed' me in front of the class and asked qns like what are the major differences and difficulties i faced when i came here..to a whole different culture..and did anyone do anything that really helped me.. and i realized i really like talking about my experiences. kinda made me think too. and it was nice to share with the class my struggles n all..cuz they're all white..and i don't think they understand the adjustments pple like me have to make. so i enjoyed that :)

talked about their individualistic culture vs our culture that's focused on family..and then told them how i envied the fact that they have the freedom of choice to do whatever they want in life and not be restricted by society/family expectations. like they can study art/music if they want. but to do that in s'pore would prob be considered suicide since that brings no future/money. and one guy was like, how can christian families think that way? what if God calls u to be a pastor? are ur parents gonna forbid u from following God's call? and that made me think. i don't know. i guess we just see serving God as a pasttime. not a full time service. most pple think we can have a job in the week and serve God during the weekends. but i think if u know what God wants u to do with ur life..u should just go for it and serve Him in ur career..not do something u don't want and serve Him on the side. know what i mean?

and also talked abt how sometimes they talk about tv/movies or stuff from their childhood i don't know..cuz i didn't grow up here..and sometimes it can feel like i'm left out cuz i don't know all this stuff. never really realized that before. and also the 'language barrier' where pple can't understand my accent. and how uncomfortable it made me to change it so they'd understand. and to have to think twice before saying something so i can phrase it how they'd understand. it's just tiring. makes me not wanna talk anymore after a while. takes so much effort just to say something. and my classmates were like, they never realized it was so tough before. so it was kinda nice to share with them how i felt :)